Recognising the Signs of Depression in Children
Just like adults, children can experience depression at varying levels. Spotting the early signs can make a big difference in providing timely support and preventing it from worsening. Depression is one of the primitive brain responses, designed to protect us by encouraging retreat and rest. In today’s world, however, this survival mechanism can misfire, leading to prolonged periods of sadness and withdrawal.
Here are some key signs to look out for if you suspect your child is depressed:
- Increased tiredness or lack of energy
- Loss of interest in activities they used to enjoy
- Emotional overreactions or increased irritability
- Persistent sadness or low mood
- Changes in sleeping patterns, either insomnia or excessive sleep
- Altered eating habits—either a loss of appetite or overeating
- Avoiding time with friends or family
- Difficulty concentrating or making decisions
- Low self-confidence or self-worth
It’s also common for children with depression to show signs of anxiety, and in some cases, you might notice self-harming behaviours or suicidal thoughts. Physical symptoms like headaches or tummy aches can also be linked to anxiety and depression.
What Causes Depression in Children?
Depression in children is often triggered by a combination of factors. The primitive brain responds to perceived threats in their environment, leading to feelings of helplessness or fear. Below are some common causes:
- Home difficulties: Stress at home, including parental conflict, financial issues, or major life changes like moving house, can contribute to depression.
- School challenges: Bullying, changing schools, friendship problems, or exam stress can all play a role.
- Family history: Children with a family history of depression may have a genetic predisposition.
- Personality type: Self-critical children may be more vulnerable to depression.
- Bereavement: The loss of a loved one can trigger feelings of deep sadness that may develop into depression.
Children may also face challenges that parents aren’t immediately aware of, so it’s important to maintain open lines of communication.
Talking to Your Child About Depression
Talking to younger children: It can be difficult for young children to express their feelings. Creating a safe space for them to talk by naming feelings and noticing behaviours can help. For example, saying, “I noticed you didn’t play with your friends today, sometimes I feel sad when I don’t join in. How are you feeling?” gives them a way to open up about their emotions.
Talking to teenagers: Teenagers often find it hard to express their emotions, but letting them know you’re available to talk is important. Offer them control over the conversation by asking what they need: “Do you want me to just listen, give advice, or take action?” This can make them feel more comfortable in opening up at their own pace.
Whatever age your child is, remember that their feelings are real and valid. If they’re not comfortable talking to you, encourage them to talk to another trusted adult.
When to Seek Help
If you’re concerned about your child’s mental health, it’s important to seek professional advice. Contact your GP for further guidance and assessment.
Small Changes That Can Make a Big Difference
When a child is in a depressed state, their brain tends to focus on negative experiences. The amygdala—the part of the brain responsible for fear and stress—becomes more sensitive, making it harder for them to see the positive side of things. Here are a few small steps you can take to help:
- Encourage Positive Reflections: Instead of asking, “How was your day?”, try asking, “What’s one good thing that happened today?” This shift encourages your child’s brain to focus on positive experiences. You can model this by sharing your own small positives, like, “I enjoyed a nice walk today” or “I had a lovely chat with Grandma.”
- Celebrate Small Wins: Depression makes it difficult to see progress, so help your child recognise small achievements. Whether it’s completing homework or playing outside for a few minutes, celebrating these actions can boost their confidence.
- Increase Serotonin: Sharing positive experiences can actually help boost serotonin, a feel-good neurotransmitter in the brain. Each time your child recalls a positive event, they re-experience that good feeling, helping them feel happier.
To learn more about the neuroscience of happiness and planting positive seeds, check out our [Happiness blog], which explains neural pruning and how to develop Positive Interactions, Positive Actions, and Positive Thoughts.
Further Support and Resources
- Young Minds: This charity provides support for children and parents. Contact them via their helpline at 0808 802 5544 or visit their website: www.youngminds.org.uk
- NHS Advice for Parents: Find more resources and advice for supporting children’s mental health here: www.nhs.uk/mental-health
If you need more tailored support, all our Youth Fairies offer free initial consultations and can be contacted through our website: www.theyouthfairy.com/fairies.
